Preparing for a meeting with your child’s school
Even after working as a school psychologist for years, I still get nervous about approaching my child’s teacher with concerns. Like most parents I know, I struggle with knowing how much communication to have, how much involvement is helpful (rather than annoying,) and even knowing how best to bring up concerns and questions I have.
That being said, I have sat through many, many meetings as a school psychologist. These primarily included problem-solving team, 504 team, and IEP team meetings. Here are my recommendations for parents to help prepare for meetings with schools:
Make sure you understand the purpose of the meeting. Is this an initial meeting to discuss problems and brainstorm together? Is this a team meeting to develop a specific plan? Is this an evaluation report meeting to review the results of an evaluation? All of these meetings will look different from one another and it can help you to come prepared and to stay engaged if you know the end goal. Don’t be afraid to ask if you aren’t sure.
Identify your child’s biggest strengths and your biggest concerns. You will probably be asked about these.
Identify your goals for your child, if you have specific ones (e.g., I expect my child to attend college, I expect a 3.0 GPA, I expect them to play sports.) You may be asked about this and it could help shape the plan developed.
Bring a notebook and write down anything you don’t want to forget to ask or mention ahead of time.
Ask to be sent notes from the meeting, if notes are taken. Keep the notes in a folder on the desktop of your computer or print them out and keep them in a folder in a safe place. These notes can help you and the team stay accountable.
Ask who you should follow-up with if you have questions after the meeting. Write down their name and contact information.
Ask if the school recommends anything you can do at home to support your child.
Remember that the school team is focused on academic skills and social/emotional/behavioral concerns impacting education. They may not share your concerns about issues that aren’t overtly impacting learning. They can, however, offer resources or the names of related professionals who can support your child outside of school, such as therapists.
None of these ideas are too mind-blowing, I know! But it helps to have some things to keep in mind as you sit down with a team of educational professionals. It can feel intimidating facing a room of new faces and hearing feedback about your child. It’s OK to voice your nervousness, frustration, or worries; in fact, it helps the team know how best to support you (and not just your child) throughout the process. Just remember that these teams are most impactful when team members work together and take shared responsibility for interventions and outcomes. We do our best work when we trust and respect one another.
