What does Sober Curious mean?

In her 2018 book, Sober Curious, Ruby Warrington asked, “Would life be better without alcohol?”

This question captures the essence of a growing movement of people getting sober curious. Being sober curious means bringing an openness and curiosity to our usage of substances. For some people, this means taking breaks from alcohol or drugs to explore their impact on our baseline functioning. For others, getting sober curious is a process of paying closer attention to how we feel when we use drugs or alcohol, even without any outward behavior change. For some, getting sober curious will lead to sobriety. For others, it won’t.

In short, it’s a very personal process that looks different for each person. And it’s a process that can be rewarding, eye-opening, and healing, no matter how it unfolds.

I have discovered, as I’ve talked with friends and colleagues, that the conversation around alcohol and its risks and benefits is a hot one at the moment. The sober curious group gatherings I’ve co-facilitated with the amazing Holly Purdy of Love Yoga have shown me how deeply women, in particular, are in need of a place to connect and share as they re-evaluate their drinking habits. For many of us, it can be isolating and shaming to realize that habit change around alcohol is difficult. We wonder what that means, we worry, and, sometimes, we drink more to cope. This can be a painful cycle for those trapped in it. Even for those of us whose sober curious journey has led us to reduce or remove alcohol from our lives, there is usually an accompanying, uncomfortable, “aha” moment of clarity. Often, we discover that drinking helped us to cope with other issues, like trauma, relationship, and boundary problems. Without alcohol masking these difficulties, they now call our attention with greater urgency. This can be a time of incredible transformation, but also of struggle.

It can be nourishing to share these experiences with like-minded women. This is why I have created (and co-created with my fearlessly sober curious partner in crime Holly) a variety of sober curious events, activities, and supportive resources. See below for details!